Saturday, August 2, 2008

Leisure wear and matching luggage

Saturday, August 2, 2008
Holiday shopping today, which I mostly escaped due to the elaborate hoax that I refer to as 'work'. Poor deluded Common Law, secure in the belief that my paltry contribution to the household finances is produced by exercise and shouting, when the truth is considerably more sordid. I'm lacking the wherewithal to construct this truth at the moment so we'll just let that bad boy lie. Saves me from doing it.

We met up in Korky's. Data bore a balloon. It has been foisted upon her by yet another Pro Clump-of-Cells, Anti-Life scumbucket.

'Would she like a balloon?' Common Law was asked, pre-foisting.

'No, but when she hits puberty she'd like a modicum of control over her own body, you fucked up fascist cunt,' Common Law would doubtless have replied, had she seen the inscription which was being cunningly obscured by the fuckbag in question. Or not. Because when I suggested this as a possible response my goodly not-wife opined:

'Like you're going to want them to have that.'

Too fucking shay.

If I am to successfully self-identify as a feminist, and I'm trying, Ringo, I'm trying really hard, then locking the Bridge Crew in a tall tower away from the prying eyes and sweaty groping grasps of teenage boys may smack a little of hypocrisy. Purple, bloated and bruised of buttock from hypocrisy's spankings as I already am, I suspect that this will not prove a major obstacle.

Or I could ditch this faux feminism, join Cóir and shove foetus photos in the faces of children. Foetus photos and pathetically phallical balloons.

12 Johns and Janes for the comment whore:

Manuel said...

hideous bastards......

Medbh said...

There's always a bunch of women eager to do the patriarchy's work and reduce women to subhuman status.
I know it's hard to grapple with, but you have to hook girls up and tell them the score and get them access to contraception. Sexual experimentation is normal and healthy.
I also know there's no promise rings in Riker's and Data's future. They're fortunate to have you.

savannah said...

i got in to an argument with a priest once..he had the most hideous pictures on display right in the middle of the sidewalk...he was screaming how i was going to hell for condoning murder, blah, blah, blah..when he stopped yelling at me, i told him i'd see him there because he was a fucking child abuser and pornographer...the MITM had to pull me away...

gimme a minute said...

Enjoy Iris today...

Can't I have one of those balls where they pledge eternal devotion to making me coffee and getting me stuff?

I'm glad I wasn't there for the foisting. There may well have been a scene.

problemchildbride said...

That balloon looks like a bloodclot on a stick. In fact, it looks a bit like a badly managed abortion.

V said...

Naww. I say go for it. If they can't live with the memory of their Dad strangling a stinking, putrefying God warrior, with what looks to me like Elmo's colostomy bag, then the world will always seem a harsh place indeed.

Don't forget that the consensus in Ireland is 'anti-choice'. It's not just the Boggers, it’s people you know.

Love the new design. Very E.T. meets ‘Donnie Darko’ meets ‘Danny the Champion of the World’ meets ‘Gay Bikers on Acid’.

Conan Drumm said...

Not a Trainspotting balloon then?

Bastards, I fucking hate them and the way they use children.

Conan Drumm said...

Off topic... I notice the 12.01/12.02am timings of the posts, are you actually pressing the button at that time (amazing consistency!) or is there a widget for popping posts up when you want them to appear?

gimme a minute said...

It deflated to that point before we were in the door. Not, I reckon, unintentionally.

All credit to CL the photographer.

Elmo no like emptying his poopy package.

And I didn't do the design. Everybody hear that? I'll be crediting properly at some point.


I've already chosen the wondering who the fuck I am on a Sunday morning.

If one sets the time and date in one's 'post options' to the future it will schedule to publish then.

Nifty, huh?

fatmammycat said...

I was going to type something else but then I got that tingling feeling I get whenever someone mentions reiki, so I'm going to go hang out the clothes and mutter VERY cursefully under my breath instead.

gimme a minute said...

Hang them out, take them in. Hang them out, take them in.

Can we get someone to reiki up the weather?

fatmammycat said...

pfft, sure, I'll just go drop an email a 2d Master. That ought to work. Got any money sweet cheeks or do you expect them to do THAT draining and emotionally sapping for free?

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