Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The great day of wrath has come

Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Now, I'm no economist, but...

I love these openings: I'm no racist but I really fucking hate darkies. I'm no paedophile but there's just something a little bit sexy about those under twelves. I'm no actor but...you get the idea.

€500 billion. The government is guaranteeing loans of €500 billion. And with what? A national debt of €45 billion. A GDP of €190 billion. Now, I'm no mathematiticianiser, but...

Really, though, what the fuck? How can you guarantee something when you can't fucking guarantee it? How do people let this shit go? And why would the ISEQ suddenly pick up on the basis of a promise that is about as fulfilable as a solemn oath to reverse the direction of the Earth's rotation about its axis, thus turning back time Superman-like, leading not just to the resurection of Lois Lane but also to the possibility of a pack of rich cunts not fucking it all up so badly when given a second chance. Though fuck knows they'd do it again. And again and again and again. I know I would, if I were a rich cunt. Ya ha deedle deedle bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.

It seems to me that the world economy, our entire fiscal system, is built on an illusion. The government is guaranteeing money in banks with money it doesn't have borrowed from other countries who have borrowed from some other cunt who doesn't have it either. Is the Emperor fucking chilly or what?

I'm wrong of course. I'm no economist. I don't know shit about any of this shit. So if someone could, in three sentences or less as I have a really fucking short attention span, explain to me exactly how it is that I'm wrong, I will be if not grateful, then certainly in less of a snot with the world and its stupid economy crap.

13 Johns and Janes for the comment whore:

Conan Drumm said...

What's more they're doing it for three years... so a shit load of deposits are going to flow into the six Irish-owned banks, and the government are going to guarantee the whole lot.

I did study a bit of economics but this kind of caper wasn't covered. I think the bookies probably know how it all works.

Sniffle&Cry said...

If you’d said it was, Just an illusion, and for the day that was in it yesterday, we could celebrate the wonder of Imagination.
Robbing, thieving cunts though, all of them. A plague on all their houses, and therein lies the lie, the value of our houses.
That mad cunt Jesus, he threw them out of temple during communion. Mad fucker……., Jesus.
Welcome back Gimme.

gimme a minute said...

Having not any assets or savings rocks, I'm finding.

Northern rocks.

There's no gate in Jerusalem called the needle, you know.

The wealthy wankstains just made that shit up. What Jebus meant was you're all going to burn for eternity, rich cunts.

redleeroy said...

Three sentences. Too long. Err, how about three syllables. Their confused.

should have written a haiku.

Caro said...

Easy. They'll just print more money. They have printing presses and shit don't they? They're the government, they can do anything they want. A bit like Superman.

And welcome back, cranky arse.

V said...

*How can you guarantee something when you can't fucking guarantee it?

Because we can always print more money as Caro said.

*How do people let this shit go?

Because they are thick.

*And why would the ISEQ suddenly pick up...?

Because the markets are now betting on the basis of what gov's will do instead of what each other does.

..You are right it is mostly an illusion. What is money only a flimsy guarantee to exchange a good?

And so now the choice is whether to stab yourself now or be burned to death later. That's all you need to know.

I just don't understand why it is such a big surprise.

Rosie said...

whereas i just don't understand.

ignorance, gentlefolk, is bliss.

Manuel said...

i'm with rosie......don't know......don't want to.....

kiki said...

you know what? it all comes down to this

stipes said...

for fucks sake Kiki, I can't understand Gimme, and you want me to read the NYT Businees section. Get a grip

Medbh said...

The first thing I heard on the radio today while getting breakfast was some professor from Montreal talking about the gendered difference in spending habits.
And the beat goes on.

V said...

Yeah it's tough, at times like these certain economists who should be locked up at all times break out of the asylum and run amok in the media confusion before we get a chance to catch them again.

gimme a minute said...

They're not the only ones.

I should get a printing press. Or Superman powers.

Supercrankyarse powers.

That's more than three sentences.

Can I be stabbed now, and have you be burned later?

Bliss comes with a comedown.

They're coming for your tips, waiter boy.

But you knew that.

Thanks, the first three sentences of that cleared it right up.

Manners! But yeah.

Jesus, you women and your manicures.

Are there no lengths to which you will not go to fuck it up for us men?

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