Friday, September 26, 2008

Like a coin that won't get tossed

Friday, September 26, 2008
I'm not old, not really.

I feel old, yes. I hurt old. My attitudes, my opinions are old. Old and sodden and limp. I act old even, from time to occasional time.

But my body, this empty shell, it ain't so old. It's young still. Or youngish. But these days, these Fridays, after a week hewn from 300 kilometres on the bike, from standing up, moving about and occasionally collapsing into a restless sleep, this body is bored of holding the fort of youth.

'The rest of you, of me, is old,' it whines, 'why must I be the only one to represent the mere thirty-fiveness of you?'

I have only this answer for my Corpus Gimme: 'That's just the way it fucking is, dude. I suggest that you ease the fuck back on the rebellious talk. Don't force me to produce the St. Paul tear gas. Don't make me make you cry all the more.'

The threat is idle, though, like all my threats, all my promises. My body, it likes the recent battering it has been receiving. It never hums and glows more than in the moments directly after a Lemonheads sprint, a Cyndi Lauper set of stairs, a Carmina Burana crazy climb. It's a big S&M freak, my body, and it's all about the M.

I need another form of intimidation, another promise of punishment. Vodka would seem to fit the bill. A bottle of Absolut would do the trick, would quell this uprising in my bones. But I'm stuck with sleeping children, a butterflying wallet and a nausea that can only be a forebearer of the oft anticipated TFC. Total. Physical. Collapse.

And so, like those greedy fucks who have made shit of these coins in my pocket, those pretty minus numbers in my online bank, it would seem that my body will be rewarded and not punished for its backchatty temerity. Rewarded by head smashing onto this keyboard for a nice, refreshing, eight hour table-nap.

That'll fucking show it.

7 Johns and Janes for the comment whore:

Medbh said...

Ease up on the self-punishment, Gimme. Have a nice sandwich and pint instead and give yourself a rest.
But do keep blogging.

Manuel said...

what medbh said......but with a smoke too....

stipes said...

hey, go easy there, we've all been "first and last",. good to see you back, but please, for the right reasons. take care

stipes said...

hey, go easy there, we've all been "first and last",. good to see you back, but please, for the right reasons. take care

stipes said...

hic cups

Sniffle&Cry said...

Woohoo Gimme, woofuckinghoo. If it’s a consolation and it won’t be, my weekends are a misery of conflict with what used to be my sleeping children. I’m the man, the fucking man who so does not want the being maness.
So, it’s fucking brilliant that you’re back and vindicates my recommendations to thousands who are now reading fresh Gimme for the first time.
Woohoo I say.

Tony Lee said...

Oh for the love of christ woman, get a fucking grip

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