Despite my aggressive outrage, my obvious arrogance, my calculated cuntishness, there are moments when I find myself looking deep within my sordid soul only to discover that yes, this one time, I am not making this shit up.
I often feel aggrieved. Slightly slighted. Put upon, perhaps. Clearly condescended to. And mostly it's my imagination hard at work, nose to the grindstone, desperate in its need to seek out an offence that will justify my anger with this stupid fucking planet and this clownish fucking life. And when my imagination lights upon this offence, then I can rant and rave and rage and rail and find, however briefly, relief.
On occasions like this, however, when I know myself to have been genuinely and purposefully wounded, right there in my dangly feelings, I cannot summon up my beast of bluster. I just sit here stunned, longing for the time when I didn't give a fuck what people did with their pathetically dramatic lives.