Tuesday, April 7, 2009

One night he woke from a vision of his own death

Tuesday, April 7, 2009
I am changed. How I am changed.

I stepped out of double spin to discover a wild and windy downpour. No Purple in which to cower as I stick strongly to my new 'no more than one commute a day by car' meaningless rule. And I though not:

'Motherfucking, cunting, bastarding, fucking cunt bastard.'

Nor even:

'Perhaps I should fake a puncture and get a cab.'


'This last ten kilometres of the night is going to increase both my fitness and my mental strength.'

A single race, that briefest of competition tastes, has transformed me straight back into a smug, non-smoking, goal-driven go getter who actually relishes half an hour in the battering wind and rain. All the way home I looked forward not to a big fat doobie and a double Caucasian in a pint glass, but to the waiting broccoli salad, with the refreshing accompaniment of lashings of tap water. My latest goal is the Wicklow 200, and by all accounts mental strength is something that I will be needing in abundance. Dear reader, you are going to fucking hate it around here until, in a moment of weakness, I take up crystal meth with the same enthusiasm that I am currently applying to my training regime. And that could be a while. Or, you know, tomorrow.

But in the meantime there remains hope and sustenance for the car crash rubber neckers of my sick psyche. I had a dream last night. It was a sexy dream. Roisin Ingle was in it. Being sexy.

You'll be wanting to tell me what that means now. Though I think I'd prefer it if you were to just kill me dead.

11 Johns and Janes for the comment whore:

stipes said...

The Wicklow 200 huh?
You do know its nothing likethe Skerries 200. There are no engines involved, and there are hills, biggish ones.

fatmammycat said...

Yay, you're going to do it! An excellent challenge.
Agreed about the weather, v.gusty. The paramour planted a palm last week, I'd be surprised if it's still there come morning.

Medbh said...

It's been fucking snowing here yesterday and today.
In April!

That 200 sounds killer, Gimme.
Mr. M will be so jealous when I tell him.

sassysundry said...

Well, damn. I'm inspired and feeling guilty at the same time. It was a wee bit cold here today, and I took the bus instead of walking.

Red Leeroy said...

Where is this magical switch, is it like that Lemsip ad? will it be caffeine and codeine that save me ?

gimme a minute said...

Whaaaaat? Fuck it, I'm committed now.

Howe gospelly of the paramour. Is he going to stick up a cross on Friday?

Well, you know what Mr Ex-Symbol said.

I suspect Mr M would be bored. It's a strictly completion gig, no racing involved.

Easy to do. Of course, walk quickly and you'll soon warm up.

Oh Jesus, what have I become?

Red Leeroy:
I have no answers, I'm afraid, just sanctimonious preaching.

emordino said...

No goal-driven go-getter I, but I fuckin love a brisk walk in windy rain. Preferably while listening to something like this.

The Ingle dream, incidentally, just means you're on top of things. Aleister Crowley all up in this motherfucker.

fatmammycat said...

I imagine Friday will be a day of deep reflection all right.

Conan Drumm said...

The Wicklow 200? Is that the overnight mountain run - through bog, heather and gorse - for the clinically insane? Ok. Better start working on your ankle strength

(Missus Cat, all freshly planted fruit trees are still standing here.)

fatmammycat said...

Survived here too Toots, although I spent a good ten minutes collecting plant pots.

gimme a minute said...

Funky. The video put me in mind of the budget.

I'm pretty sure it happens during the day, but the rest sounds right. Ankle and bumceps strength shall be required.

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