Wednesday, April 1, 2009

People don't realize that two large pieces of coral, painted brown and attached to his skull with common wood screws can make a child look like a deer

Wednesday, April 1, 2009
The most important aspect of Monday's throwaway post about the difficulty and pointlessness of debating with morons has been lost in the mists of rage that descended upon Gimme for daring to offer a three word critique of a 'faux-naive rage bait' presentation by the most widely read guy in the history of the world. Move the fuck over Old Testament author guy (Dan Brown? I can never remember) there's a new buck in town.

To be Krystle: Gimme stands by his 'incitement to misogyny' remark and thinks people need to either chill the fuck or be less fucking stupid. Either or. They both work for the G man.

So to the aforementioned aspect of importance. It's the title, folks. Did you catch the title.? So very, very many levels. If you're new to the wonders of Stranded on Gaia, and I know there's plenty of you still dropping by today, you may be unaware that all of my titles are taken from the lyrics of songs. And they are always multi-faceted and worthy of your research. But deep as these daily headlines doubtless are, they be a piss puddle on the bathroom floor compared to that last one.

'Just like that robbery in '62'

Get it? You think you get it, but you don't. Yes, it is from a song by the name of 'You Keep It All In' which includes the line 'the conversation we had last night when all I wanted to do was knife you in the heart'. So there's your first connection. But the name of the song too, folks! The post is about keeping it all in rather than engaging with twats! So far so fucking brilliant, right?

But if you can fucking Adam and Eve it, there is even more. I might have used the line 'Just like that murder in '73'. But I chose to not. Instead, I used the one with the word 'robbery'. Why? Because the comment that I quoted to prove my point came from a website written by this bunch of people called 'Bock the....' Oh yeah. That's post titling shit that you can take to the bank, baby.

Save your applause until you have read some of the others:

The recent but wonderfully obscure:

Her mother said 'Love is not that way. Dear God he'll pay.'

The little Biafra playlet:

If Jesus saw Pat Robertson what do you think he'd say?

And one from way, way back in 2007. Back in the day when we got on so very well, even if they was telling me what to do. Sniff:

You won't believe what Mr. Stitches saw

13 Johns and Janes for the comment whore:

Inkwit said...

That's a great song. My favourite thing is its moral ambiguity towards the narrator. He justifies "keeping it all in" on the grounds that if he let it all out he would knife his girlfriend. That's a scary man.

The murder in '73, of course, can't literally have happened to him: he is adopting the posture of a victim, but failing to dignify the actual murder victim with a single detail about her.

(Or him. Curse my reflex misandry.)

We are mired, Gimme, MIRED in moral complexity.

Conan Drumm said...

I do believe the creepiest song ever in this context is 'A Guy is A Guy', sung by Doris Day. It has my unreserved recommendation.

Inkwit said...

That's wonderful, Conan. For an antidote, may I recommend the equally sublime Lesley Gore?

gimme a minute said...

There's quite a bit of spousal abuse on that album.

'Woman in the wall', 'I love you but you're boring'. You'd wonder about our Paul. Or his girlfriend.


That is very, very disturbing.

Might have to put it up on Saturday when I've filled my weekly insulting the innocents quota.

eejit meeja said...

It's very simple former-Samson

Bock was handed his over-inflated bollocks on a plate and decided to go down the "this has caused me hurt and pain" path

His blog states "offending everyone since....."

apparently offence is a one way street in Limerick.

Medbh said...

Conan, that song is a creep-fest!

Gimme, I'm sending you some virtual laurel leaves.

Twenty Major said...

Got to agree with the eejit fella.

That Doris Day song is mental.

"He raped the shit out of me like I knew he would - LOL!"

Red Leeroy said...

Gimme, does your aura smile and never frown, and perhaps soon you will be president?

gimme a minute said...

A one way, knife wielding, gun toting street by all accounts.

That doesn't really make sense. But knives and guns are my default reactions to any mention of Limerick.

And some tasty bonemeal treats? I'm pretty sure I've been lapdogified by you too.

She must accept the consequences. She was walking down the street being a woman, don't you know.

Perhaps. It's certainly time we had somebody not called Mary in the job.

Twenty Major said...

She must accept the consequences. She was walking down the street being a woman, don't you know.

Yes, they must accept the consequences. MUST.

Medbh said...

Gimme, hah!
Yes, I'm sure you're considered to be a traitor to your gender for calling bullshit on misogynist bloggers.
You've been brainwashed by the global gynocracy!

gimme a minute said...

Promise us you'll use your powers of reading and interpreting for good.

Can't. Took the red pill.

Conan Drumm said...

Medbh, I couldn't believe what I was hearing when I first heard it. I had an image in my head of a woman pursued down the street by an attacker. And I couldn't help wondering, since it is so weirdly perverse, if it was meant to be ironic or as a statement of sorts about women's choices.

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