Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Words don't come easily

Wednesday, October 14, 2009
I both like and respect my next door neighbours. I do. Krauts to the left of me, woman and children to the right. I especially respect, and indeed like the woman to the right, who, in the face of disproportionately intense, albeit accidental hostility on my part has returned this hostility in a much more measured, though still pretty fucking hostile, fashion. I have taken down the offending, offensive posts and I look forward to us continuing our mutual pretending this all never happened and just getting on with it relationship. Maybe we could progress from an aggressive backwards nod to our erstwhile amiable hello, though? For the kids? No pressure, like. I am without doubt more sinning that sinned against.

Wow. I was just going to bang out another snarky segment about the other next door neighbours, specifically their trumpet playing of Christmas songs at 10pm on an early October evening son and all that came out instead. Oh well. This way I finally get to use a Gately sung lyric as a title.

16 Johns and Janes for the comment whore:

Manuel said...

I have racist old woman for a neighbour....she doesn't like the Japanese and is in constant fear of them moving in....odd woman

Andrew said...

"This way I finally get to use a Gately sung lyric as a title."

Um, I think you'll find that Ronan Keating sang that particular line. Jesus, Gimme, stop getting Boyzone wrong.

Fat Sparrow said...

My ex-neighbors were wife-beating, child-smacking, drug addicted, stupid white trash fucking cunts that egged our van as we were moving out.

Now that we're in the 'burbs living with my parents, I have yet to meet their neighbors, nor do I want to. Everyone uses their clickers, drives into their garages, closes their doors and pretends that no one else exists. It's fucking brilliant.

When I win the Lottery I'm gonna buy a goddamn compound with a moat that has sharks with frickin' laser beams on their heads.

Twenty Major said...

Yes, but do they park in front of your house?

Sniffle said...

There you are, stuck in the middle with them.

gimme a minute said...

Manuel:
I bet she was at Pearl Harbour. Or maybe she just sat through the film. Although then she'd probably be more frightened of Ben Affleck moving in.

Andrew:
My bleeding ears would like to thank you for the twenty minutes I just spent trawling through live versions of the song in question, looking for evidence to the contrary.

Which I failed to find. Bastard.

Fat Sparrow:
Oooh, someone could do with a little dose of community spirit.

Twenty Major:
Yeah, that occurred to me. It's been a while since I got called your lapdog, so I thought I'd just keep emulating your posts until I get that reputation back.

As it happens we all have our own driveways in my uber burb.

Sniffle:
Stuck in the middle with the Bridge Crew and Common Law. Could be a whole lot worse.

Conan Drumm said...

Wait a minute, I thought la femme d'à côté had unpardonably used a phaser on the Bridge Crew?

Sniffle said...

Stealers wheel Gimme, jokers to the left, not Krauts.

gimme a minute said...

Conan:
And I responded to this stun setting with a full scale Borg blog attack which was launched without knowledge of the full extent of my readership.

I am contrite.

Sniffle:
Well, yeah. It was a purposeful misquote you see.

Conan Drumm said...

Eeek, the perils of blogging.

Andrew said...

Shane Lynch wrote the lyrics, y'know.

Twenty Major said...

As it happens we all have our own driveways in my uber burb.

Well la-di-dah.

And if I had my own range of t-shirts I would make you wear one.

problemchildbride said...

My neighbours are big mariachi fans.

gimme a minute said...

Conan:
Indeed. Of course if I wasn't such an asshole it wouldn't be a problem.

Andrew:
Really? I thought that was you.

Twenty Major:
I already have my very own Twenty Major y-fronts.

I've said too much.

Problemchildbride:
Every night's a party so?

It's violin over this way tonight. Different child. She's been tuning up for half an hour.

antimatter said...

I just heard a Xmas song on the radio. Horrifying enough but it was performed by none other than the one and only Bob Dylan! I shit you not.

gimme a minute said...

Antimatter:
There's a whole album!

It's going to be a rough Crimbo for my ladies.

 
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